What are Dreams?
Stories in which we anticipate the future.
Why do we like to dream?
Because our Limbic system (emotional part of the brain). It’s priorities is to feel good in the moment and avoid discomfort. So when we dream, we get a feel good or dopamine kick. Hence it keep chasing the feeling by dreaming more and more, as if it’s a drug. Pre-frontal Cortex (PFC) is more logical, it wants to plan the future, calculate the probability.
Problem : PFC cannot do it’s job when the Limbic is on it’s dreaming vacations. When Limbic works PFC take rest and visa a versa.
Solution : Wait until the Limbic calms down, then think. We call it “Getting back to Reality”.
How do dreams come true?
Thoughts (mere electric signals in the brain) are converted into Reality, only by Physical Action(s) of some sort. Both Limbic & PFC can take actions. But the difference in there “working styles” are –
–Limbic actions are very short term. In fact, they are actually “Reaction” to some triggers.
– PFC actions are more planned, sustainable in the long-term (as to make a dream come true, the actions needs to be executed sustainably with planning).
– It could see the future beyond the present moment’s feel good & bad. So for making a dream come true, you need to give power to the PFC.
3 steps to give power of the PFC :
1. Write describing your dreams – “More the words you use to describe an emotion, the more the PFC understands it.” – Write about why do you want to achieve that dream, what will you feel after achieving it, what motivates you right now, etc.
2. Convert the dream into a Goal – Dreams are vague ideas placed somewhere in the future, whereas Goals are tangible targets which can be described clearly and also can be measured in the short term (like in weeks to months).
3. Take each Goal & break it down into Objectives – This is the Key for making the dreams come true. An acronym that can help you design objectives well enough is –
SMART.
S : Specific. Ex – How often are you going to go to the gym, when and for how long will you exercise, etc.
M : Measurable.
A : Achievable. Compare the objective’s achievability with your previous patterns.
R : Relevant. Are the objectives in alignment with the bigger picture (i.e. your dream) ?
T : Time Bound.
Note : Learn to keep setting the difficulty level of your objectives. Keep the track of your objective’s success and failure ratio. Then keep increasing or decreasing the difficulty level accordingly. (25% Failure rate is healthy for sustaining motivation).
Why rewarding small wins, work wonders
Main challenge due to which many people fail to achieve their dreams – Dreams come from Limbic system, which wants to feel good all the time. As if it has achieved something really great, validated, etc. even if it’s just an imagination.
Actions that we need to take do not generally give us that much feel good in the short term. Hence, we must learn to reward ourselves to prevent the Limbic from losing it’s patience and over-ruling the PFC and making it forget about this dream and instead dream about something else (because that’ll be new, exciting & the reward via dreaming will be immediate).
Final Advice : Do not tell much people about your dreams. This is one of the tricks that limbic system pulls to get some feel good (quick & cheap validation) You may share it after completing a few objectives so that sharing about it doesn’t become counter-productive anymore.
